Racing Bats 1/12/08

THE START OF A NEW ERA… Well almost

RACING BATS 3 VIDEO CALI 2

RACING BATS 2 SABRETOOTH 3

‘TWAS a cold December day when a vicious chill rattled the bones of people everywhere and sensible men stayed away from activities involving the wearing of shorts. But one group of lads took a deep breath of the crisp winter’s air and descended on the Wandsworth Arena under fresh leadership - and thus a new era was born. Up went the chant… “O Captain! My Captain!” as the portly man known only as ‘The Cat’ led out his team with one objection in mind… taking six points from two of the front-running opponents.

But alas it was not to be and the Racing Bats – although finally showing glimpses of their full and undeniable potential – had to settle for a hard-fought win and an unlucky defeat as they moved up to joint third in the table – with the dream of silverware still alive.

The enchanted night saw a revitalised looking Ando Hep prove that, without the anchor of captaincy dragging him down (and just the weight of that ‘Lesbian Fro’ holding him back), he was able to actually exert some effort and score two, no one, no two, no it was definitely one well-taken goal. In an in-game rant to the ref the ex-captain could be heard to say: “That f***ing second f***ing goal crossed the f***ing line ref you f***ing blind t***er!”

Also on offer to the scores of loyal Bat’s fans, who travel every week to watch their heroes play, was a contender for Goal-of-the-Season and a dead-cert for Goal-of-his-Life by none other than James ‘The Cat’ Hepburn ©.

Having silkily turned the defender down the left-flank with a drop-of-the-shoulder, The Cat unleashed hell with his faithful left foot and in true Roy of the Rovers style almost left a gaping hole in the keeper’s net. However suggestions of a new nickname of Captain Marvel were laughed off by everyone but The Cat himself.

As we approach the end of the Bat’s first ever season the race for top goalscorer is really hotting-up with out-of-form Rob and in-form Damo both on 11 goals thus far. The difference being that Damo has got his in nine appearances whereas Rob has taken 15. Stalley is the bookie’s favourite, and could have been further ahead if it weren't for Sabretooth's keeper who stopped a barrage of net-destined shots. But Rob still has the potential to cause an upset and is also in the race for top assister – level at the top on five with The Cat.

On a more sour note reports are suggesting that one of the teams members spent a night at her Majesty’s pleasure on the weekend. Reports are unconfirmed and no more details are available after the club successfully applied to the High Court for a media blackout injunction.

Once again the Bats may have only come away with three points but still put in two of the most convincing performances of the season and can't be ruled out of a possible surge to a second place finish.





PLAYER------Apps---Goals---Assists---GK Apps---Clean sheet---Dis
D.Vorobtsova---15--------7-------4-----------0---------0---------------2
A.Hodgson-------1-------0-------1-----------0---------0---------------0
T.Hodgson-------0-------0-------0-----------0---------0--------------0
S.McCartney-----11-------3-------3-----------4----------0--------------0
R.Felgate--------15------11-------5-----------0---------0--------------0
J.Hepburn-------12-------3-------5-----------3--------1---------------0
A.Hepburn-------10-------3--------4----------5---------1--------------0
D.Hepburn-------12-------2--------2----------3---------0---------------0
D. Stalley---------9-------11--------4----------0---------0--------------0